Yes, I completely agree, Stella — I have had some spectacular kisses without any tongue!
Maybe you are right — some sort of discomfort about not wanting to kiss these guys. I mastered the “turn the cheek” move by the time I was 18.
My friend, DEF, in particular, is very respectful. He is not into foisting himself onto someone. If she was uninterested in kissing him, he would have preferred her to tell him. (We actually briefly dated so I can attest to knowing him in a more intimate setting.)
Thanks as always for reading and responding!