Thank you for responding, Pua!

To be very honest, I have found that many of the guys I would have considered an intimate relationship with were emotionally unavailable, wanted to sleep with other women while sleeping with me too (that doesn’t interest me), were looking for a sexual relationship based on my degradation, focused on their careers and unable to make me the type of priority I would have looked for, or were not interested in spending more time to get to know me prior to sleeping with me.

I admit that I’m very picky. Add in that it’s a “guy’s market” here in Austin since there are WAY more 20 and 30-something women here. That has added up to very few actual partners.

My own therapist has recommended I move. Austin is a very challenging market for women my age to find men who are interested in actually dating and any sort of relationship.

So, I suppose the depressing answer is that my approach has proven to be mostly very unsuccessful! But I would prefer to be patient than put myself into a sexual relationship out of desperation or settling.

I may have to re-evaluate in the coming years, but for the time being I know that it would cause me great pain to have sex in a casual manner.

I enjoy reading the stories by you and some of the other more sexually experienced (I think that’s the word I’m looking for) women out there in Mediumland. I think it’s wonderful to see the various female perspectives and voices out there. I know that I have a more traditional viewpoint, but think sex is an amazing experience and connection with the right person.

I had stepped away from the computer and remembered this story. It’s not quite what you were inquiring about, but it’s probably the closest thing I have:

Thanks again for reading and providing additional insight!

Queen of mixtapes. Lover of music, travel, and fashion. Authentic sharer of life lessons and dating foibles.

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store