No, I was asking the exact opposite of what you wrote.

I was allowing him to sleep with whomever he wanted while he and I got to know each other better. (I don’t sleep with multiple partners. He was aware that I did not have any interest in casual sex or FWB with him or ANY man.)

I wanted to give him the flexibility to, ahem, sow his oats as needed while we explored our relationship in a non-sexual context. (There would have been physical touch and intimacy, but not on that level.)

I was essentially asking for a few weeks or a couple of months of “dating” each other before we decided to take our relationship to a sexual level (that is where the mutual exclusivity would have come into play).

In my mind this was a fair compromise: he can date and sleep with whomever while we can have additional time to get to know each other to determine how we feel about each other, whether there might be a deeper emotional connection made.

He said he was not willing to wait to have sex with me. I was uncomfortable with: it being on HIS terms, his sleeping with multiple partners, and his unwillingness to wait even a few additional weeks for us to get to know each other so that I would be at ease and ready to make that kind of decision.

I’m old-fashioned that way!

Thank you for reading, Bill!

Queen of mixtapes. Lover of music, travel, and fashion. Authentic sharer of life lessons and dating foibles.

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store