I’ve found that a significant number of guys that I’ve dated/interacted with are what I call the confused and the confusing. They would tell you that they want someone like me. But when confronted with me, they realize they don’t actually want to put in the time and emotional effort that a relationship would require.
Fear? Unresolved emotional issues? Life off track? (Or maybe they really don’t like me at all and are trying to soften the blow by blaming it on something else?)
I’m not really certain, though I know a couple of guys I’ve really liked (and vice versa) were not in good places in their lives.
My own therapist has told me that I’ve had some of the worst dating luck of any of her patients. Ever.
So there’s that. (I just chuckled.)
In any case, I don’t have all the answers, but can confirm that dating is so tricky to navigate for nearly everyone!
Best of luck on your search— as they say, it just takes one!