I’ve been meaning to come back to your thoughtful response, David "Doc" Jackson.

What’s interesting here is that you don’t know me. (To be clear: I say that matter-of-factly. Definitely not in an accusatory manner.) You only know a story or two that I’ve written.

What you can’t know is that in the past I would have spiraled emotionally with how that guy treated me. I mean, I would have been grossed out but I would have also felt inadequate and questioned some things about myself.

I’m a VERY even-keeled person. I’m a female INTJ Capricorn — no hot head here!

For ME it was such a great thing to get mad at HIM! To not blame myself or to spiral. That reaction for ME was so empowering and filled with growth!

When I actually had that phone call with him, I was SO, SO calm. I just leveled everything he tried to throw at me. He’s an attorney. He’s used to arguing and winning. But he had met his match. I ended up leveling him. And it was glorious!

I’m proud of my anger. I’m proud of my standing up for myself. I have zero regrets for the energy I put into standing up for myself. And, of course, I’m also glad that I did not spend one more second on him!

In my particular case, the anger and “confrontation” (I use the term loosely) were a turning point in how I approach dating. And though some tears were shed and I did experience some pain and disappointment, it truly was a very positive thing for me to go through.

Thanks again for reading and responding!

Queen of mixtapes. Lover of music, travel, and fashion. Authentic sharer of life lessons and dating foibles.

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