I should have known you were British!
I see you’re from Sheffield, which is on my list of places to visit — the industrial music scene was insane back in the day! I finally made it to Manchester to explore the Madchester/Hacienda haunts. I will probably end up writing some more stories about my Manchester experience, but I did share this tale should you find yourself bored.
Your story was delightfully quirky and entertaining — brava, Ellie Scott!