I have been able to stay genuine friends with a few guys I have dated. But I have also stayed “friends” as you are describing. Which is to say: not really very friendly.
Your latest guy is very familiar to me. Confused and confusing is how I describe someone like that!
You deserve someone who wants you! Heck, I wrote a story about that, too!
Wishing you all the best as you find someone who knows how amazing you are and shows you!